I hate to say it, but the dating aspect of my blog has come to a close. I know I said in my last post that I was seeing someone that I really liked, and we just had that monogamous conversation talk the other night over the best and most thoughtful date I've ever had in my life. This goes to say that I still will write about interesting dating issues, but maybe I'll start using stories from my friends or I don't even know at the time being, but I promise I will keep you all entertained. I can really get creative sometimes, so I'm really not too worried. I've had a numerous amount of people tell me that they will be upset that I won't have any more dating stories to post, but who's to say I'm not going to wake up one day and elope with this guy? That could be an interesting story, but I'm not going to get ahead of myself too much ;) Plus, I did tell him about this blog of mine...
Regardless of the fact that I need to write a closing blog of my dating life, (I mean this was supposed to be a menswear blog) I really need to write about chivalry before I do so. What exactly is chivalry in this day and age? Is it opening car doors? Paying for your drunken meal at The Grilled Cheese Factory after you took eight shots each on his tab at a dive bar? Is it having him fill your tires with air because you don't understand anything about cars? Is it having him notarize your teacher certificate paperwork? Is it buying you your favorite flowers? (Side note- I can proudly say all of those have happened to me, hence the detailed descriptions.) Whatever chivalry is it you, it really depends on your standards and how much moral respect you have for yourself. (This is a blog, I am entitled to my own opinion, so hear me out) Anyone could think paying for a drunken meal at The Grilled Cheese Factory $13 later is just fan-fucking-tastic or maybe your idea of chivalry is someone who spends $275 at a five star restaurant in New York City; to me chivalry is really something that is an act that has meaning to (that particular person), that no money value can ever attain. I want someone to listen to what I have to say, I want someone to go out of their way for me, I want my partner to respect me as much as I respect him, I want it all; I mean who doesn't? After all, isn't the point of dating to find your best friend? With sexual chemistry of course... Isn't the most healthy relationship start with a friendship? We all have our different opinions on this one, but I really find that chivalry is just something a guy has or he doesn't, most of the time your parents raise you with this set of core values.
All my life I've dated guys that I liked, but I've really I've had some little doubt in my mind about, yet always ignored. I don't want to come off as being passive aggressive, I'm just being honest, it is what it is and now where I am in my life, I'm fully aware of it. Maybe I just wasn't ready to find "the one" just yet while dating in the past. I had fun in my last relationships, but there comes a time in a place where you need to look for a baby daddy/husband and not just someone who's fun to get drunk and have sex with. I had a great time on Match.com, and I would seriously recommend it to anyone; I really had an insanely good time after being on it for two and a half months, even with the drama. I just was finally getting to a point that I was over it, I was over the dating scene, and trying to remember everything that every guy I went on a date with said to me so I didn't seem rude. (Like I said, I never made it to making flashcards of every one of the guys.) It honestly just got too hard and too overwhelming, and dating really shouldn't be like that. Then, I met a game changer; someone that actually stood out to me in more ways than one. I know I'm young, I'm only 24, but when you meet someone that actually makes your heart skip a beat, you got to just go with the flow. I don't think there's a time in your life that's "ideal" to be married or pregnant or all those other fun things, especially when Mr. or Mrs. Right come along; When it happens, it happens. If I get married tomorrow, as my darling would ironically say, "YOLO." (For all you old people on here- You Only Live Once.) It's really just so true even though that phrase is just miserable!
So, the other night I went on a date that's truly one for the books, at least in my dating history. I feel the need to express this because it's just was that awesome and thoughtful and every girl should have a guy out there that treats them like a princess. I hate when guys think that concept is stupid (girls thinking they need to be treated like a princess), I mean after all, you're supposed to be doing most of the wooing, even in today's modern society. Every girl should have a guy that treats them like gold, or every guy should have another guy that treats them like gold; it's whatever tickles your fancy. Everyone in this world deserves respect. So, anyways, this date... I knew about it for a week, but he never told me what we were doing, it was my first surprise date ever, and I was scared...
6:00 PM- He picks me up at work, he comes into my store with one single flower from a hydrangea. (points to this guy, he knows how to listen when I speak) He says in the cutest and dorky-est way ever, "I didn't want to be cheesy and bring you a whole thing of flowers." I love it, I don't usually love cheesy and typical, too cliché for my liking. I could tell he's extremely nervous by the little stutter in his insanely sexy Polish accent. It's cute, I blush, my heart flutters whenever he speaks; I mean I am your stereotypical born and raised New Jersey white chick, accents are like once and a blue moon thing for me. I go and I get changed out of my uniform and my coworkers entertain him/I told them to feel him out for me. (I'm so kind, I know, sorry my dear.) So, all is good, I'm all dressed and ready to go in one of my absolute favorite dresses- a white with black polka dot dress and bright pink shoes; I had this outfit planned out ever since he told me we would be going on a surprise date, and I knew I had to wear it, especially when he said he loved a woman in polka dots.(So fem and chic)
6:30 PM- Anyways, back on track... So, we get to his car and he's still nervous while he plugs the destination into his GPS; he drops his phone several times, but I like nothing ever happened, he has complete composure... He also greeted me with a hydrangea in a bottle of Poland Spring, and I wouldn't have it any other way. At this point in time, the only thing I knew about the date is as follows:
1. I wasn't allowed to wear heels.
2. I had to be comfortable.
3. He needed to bring a car with a bigger backseat... (Get your mind out of the gutter.)
4. I wasn't going to be home before midnight... (Again, get your mind out of the gutter.)
5. People now a days don't really do this anymore, he's an old soul, just like yours truly.
6. It's a fifth date, and he says he won't bring me to the woods and kill me; good to know.
7. We are going somewhere to pick something up and then we are going somewhere for the final destination.
So, he informs me that we have an hour drive. An hour drive... Where is he taking me? What the hell are we doing? Guesses people?
7:30 PM- We arrive at a strip mall. Hmm... I see a pizza place, I love pizza more than anything in the world, hopefully he remembers, it is Friday and I do have pizza every Friday. (True, but not true on the favorite thing in the world part... I'll let you take that as you want.) So, he says he did a lot of research and this is one of the best pizza places in New York. New York you say... Yeah, I was in Warwick, NY which was basically like the sticks, still had no idea what we were doing. Maybe a pizza eating contest?
8:15 PM- We pick up the two (yes, two pies of pizza. I told him I could eat a pie by myself in one sitting and ironically enough, he's the pizza eating champion of his town. After the told me that, I knew our meeting was fate.) pies of pizza and we head to our next destination.
8:30 PM- We arrive at Warwick Drive in movie theatres. Root beer- my fav, wine- my fav, plastic wine glasses (classy like that), and bug spray- because bugs terrify me, pillows, blankets, etc... Nothing short of thoughtful just to make a lady feel comfortable.
1 AM?- We drive to Pennsylvania to look at the stars in his favorite spot on the east coast.
I'll just leave it at I didn't get back to wee hours of the morning, but he was a complete gentleman and all. Every girl should be treated in such a thoughtful manner; I mean the guy planned out thirteen other dates before he thought of this one...
So what should be expected when it comes to a first date? I say first date because technically it was our "first date." Long story short, before this, we only visited each other on each others lunch hours, so it was a fake first date. I can't bore you too much with my personal life... So, when push comes to shove, what do you prefer? I could tell you this, 9 out of 10 women are totally with my thoughts on the surprise date idea; every lady is a sucker for a romantic guy. So if you're a guy, what will you plan for your next first date? All I ask is that you be original; I mean if you're looking for something serious, you're bound to get a second date after you take a girl on a date that is extremely well thought out, just like stated above. Like I said, it doesn't matter to most girls how much you spend, (the world is full of divas.) to most it really matters on how much you actually planned the date around that girl that you're going out with; what does she like? what are her favorite things in the world and how many of those favorite things can you fit into one date? With that, that's my definition of chivalry. Think of the girl you're seeing and what she likes and dislikes on your next first date if you want to keep her around, don't do your typical dinner date, think outside of the box and I promise you'll get some extra kisses for it.
xox C
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